When a Small Mistake Feels Like a Big Deal
At the start of this year, I made a small but noticeable mistake: I wrote “2024” instead of “2025” in multiple places promoting our new series and bible study—and then emailed it to everyone in the church. As soon as I realized it, my stomach sank. It felt like a spotlight had been placed on my error for everyone to see. All week, I replayed the mistake in my head, feeling embarrassed and self-conscious.
Why bring it up? Because it’s a perfect illustration of shame. Something small spiraled into a much bigger weight in my mind, convincing me I’d failed and that people were judging me. That’s what shame does—it exaggerates our mistakes, isolates us, and whispers, “You’re not enough.”
But here’s the truth I’ve learned: shame doesn’t have to define you. It doesn’t have to be the end of your story. Whether it’s a small mistake like mine or something much larger, shame can be overcome. And finding belonging is possible—even when it feels furthest away.
The Impact of Shame: Why It Hits So Hard
Shame is more than just an unpleasant feeling—it’s a deeply human experience that affects every part of us. Research shows that shame:
- Affects Mental Health: Leading to self-doubt, depression, and anxiety.
- Triggers Physical Stress: Raising cortisol levels, which harm immunity and overall health.
- Disconnects Us from Others: Convincing us we’re unworthy of love or acceptance.
Shame isn’t just something we feel—it’s something we carry.
Over time, it builds walls that separate us from the relationships, growth, and peace we long for.
What If Shame Isn’t the Final Word?
One of the most powerful stories about overcoming shame is found in the tale of the prodigal son. Even if you’re not religious, its message is universal. It’s about a young man who believes his mistakes define him, only to discover that grace and belonging are still within reach.
In the story, the son expects rejection after squandering his inheritance. Instead, he’s met with open arms. His father doesn’t just forgive him—he restores him. His father does it by taking the shame onto himself! What a powerful reversal. It’s a reminder that shame doesn’t have to write the final chapter. Restoration is possible.
How to Rewrite Your Story and Overcome Shame
- Identify the Source of Shame:
- Pause and reflect: Where is this feeling coming from? Is it tied to past mistakes, societal pressures, or the critical voice inside your head? Understanding its roots is the first step toward breaking free
- Challenge Shame’s Lies:
- Shame often whispers, “You’ll never measure up” or “You’re not worthy.” These are lies. Instead, speak truth over yourself: “I’m growing, and I am loved.” Begin replacing self-doubt with affirmations of your worth and potential.
- Find Relationships That Heal
- True healing from shame happens in connection with others. Surround yourself with people who look beyond your past and see the incredible potential God has placed in you. These relationships will help you grow, not stay stuck.
- Know You Are Fought For:
- Whether you’ve realized it before or not, Jesus is actively inviting you into His family. He took on shame so you wouldn’t have to carry it. The freedom He offers is always within reach—it’s your choice to step into it.
Watch the Sermon: “Shattered Shame”
Want to dive deeper into this topic? Watch this week’s sermon for a closer look at how grace breaks through shame and restores belonging. Together, we’ll explore how to apply these truths to your life.
Click here to watch the sermon
A Question For You:
Final Thought: Shame may feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have the power to define your story. Let’s take the first step toward freedom and belonging—starting today.
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Join the Conversation
This blog is part of a larger journey. Over the next seven weeks, I’ll be exploring how shame, judgment, and division affect our lives—and how we can find belonging and restoration. I’d love for you to join the conversation.
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